My life is a burning page, the words are there but the ashes make it hard to save, and I could put this fire out, I could end this rage, but the thought of rain makes me want to run away. Can I just sail away? Can I just forget everything? I know I’m not worth the save. I’ll sail away, off to a better place, I’ll learn the waves and the storms, I will make peace with myself, like never before. Last chance to make peace with myself, it’s all up to me now. Don’t ask me to stay, it’s really too late, I’ve got to find my place and learn from my mistakes. Pick up what I can, take what’s left, say goodbye to this place. Goodbye life.
Talking Myself Down
The winds are taking me, will this be the death of me, I chose this life on my own, with no place to call home, I need to get some sleep, this is meant to be. I need to calm down, and just breathe, feel the waves underneath my feet. There’s that sinking feeling, it’s pulling me under, I just want to sleep, this is meant to be. I need to calm down, and just breathe, feel the waves underneath my feet. She’s not thinking about me, just leave me be. I’m not going back, there’s nothing left for me. Breathe, just breathe, feel the waves underneath my feet, I need to calm down, set me free, these waves could be the death of me, I need to calm down. This is meant to be.
Red eyes, black circles, tired lines, you were killing me. Dead inside from the secrecy and lies, try to smile but there’s nowhere to hide, it’s not okay. The birds are circling, I hear them calling to me, waiting to die, I can’t stop seeing your face. Living in complacency, fighting relentlessly, this is the end. Can’t you see, I had to leave, can’t you see, it’s not that easy, try to hide what we both knew, this is the end of our story. Living in complacency, fighting relentlessly, this is the end. I’ve gotta fight my way through, away from you, away from us, away from this place, it’s way too much. Can’t you see, I had to leave, can’t you see, it’s not that easy, try to hide what we both knew, this is the end of our story. This is the end.
I’m drifting away, all of my worries, are catching up with me, is that make believe? I’m losing it. What if we never had, what I thought, get out of my head, get out of my heart, I’m left with regret, you can have it all, you can have what’s left of me. You can take what you thought of me, it was wrong all along, you can have what’s left of me. I think I saw your face, looking back at me, is this a dream, is this reality? Why do I see what I don’t believe? Why do I see what I don’t believe? I’m losing it, I’m losing it all. I hate who I see, I hate where I am. Why do I see what I don’t believe? Why do I see what I don’t believe?
The memories that kill me inside, are the nightmares that eat you alive, silent battles wage on, broken trust remains strong, how long is too long, will we ever move on? I don’t want to be, what holds you back, and keeps you awake, night after night. Let the tide, take me away. There’s no guide to lead me back to shore. When I walked away, it was the end of me, I last saw your face, it was more than I could take. If you really wanted this to last, then you wouldn’t have wrecked all we had. This will be the last time, I let the waves take me alive. You won’t be who keeps me here. If you’re waiting for me to break right along with you, let me be the first to say, I’m not going, drown, drown, I won’t fall apart. When I walked away, it was the end of me, I last saw your face, it was more than I could take. Let the current take me away.
The Slow Climb
Give it up, I have to give you up. You couldn’t find yourself, and I took the blame, if I’m forced to give you up, I’ll never be the same. You left me with every memory, it haunts my sleep. Throwing rocks at the sea, I’ll throw you away, I couldn’t make you stay, let every ounce of me, drown in our memory. Falling apart at the seams, why is this happening to me? I’m done holding on, I’m not waiting for you, would it ever be the same? Sometimes I swear we only change just to watch the time fade away, fade away.
She pushed the hair out of my eyes, and pulled me close, I can’t help but feel at home, our lips touch, with my heart racing, I felt the warmth of her hand, there’s no going back after this, can I go through with it? I don’t want her to stop, can she be my outlet? The room is dark, the bed is warm, all my walls are down. I crave the madness, nothing makes sense, this is true bliss. I taste her body on my lips, skin to skin, how did I go through with it? I taste her and realize how hungry I’ve been. Pulling on my waist, her tongue knows me, and finally I feel free. I feel free.
Where Am I
Here I am, standing at the edge again, wondering where you are, if you like your new life, and if you traveled far, there’s a part of you I’ll never lose, no matter how hard I try, I’ll let go of what I thought I knew, you’re in my rear view, and where I go, you’ll never know. I can’t look back, and see you there, you’re gone, you’re long gone, I want you here with me, everything inside tells me to move on, I should be stronger, I feel weak, I should know better, I can’t think.